Wouldn’t it be cool if..?

Wouldn’t it be cool if?

Add your responses below to this fun and creative way to stimulate your brain. This is one of the few exercises that is always going on in my mind but I have never written out. Use this as an area to look at each others ideas and build on your own.

Just reply with Wouldn’t it be cool if and add your reply.

I’ll begin!

Wouldn’t it be cool if the floor really was lava?

72 Responses to “Wouldn’t it be cool if..?

  1. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if we all had chauffeur monkeys?

  2. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if every day was a holiday?

  3. not Arantxa Sánchez Vicario says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if chapter 11 was just the latter stages of a really good book?

  4. little enrique says:

    wouldn’t it be chevere if penguins could fly?

  5. bk katz says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if cats could take people to the doctor and have their fingernails removed?

  6. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if an appropriate formal greeting was a karate kick instead of a handshake?

  7. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if the Earth were round?

  8. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if the Earth were round, but round like an Oreo, and at some point God got hungry and couldn’t resist taking it apart to get at the cream filling?

  9. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you had a tele-porter that you could use either to move instantly from place to place, or to call the suns coach?

  10. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if we could switch our gasoline power to compact fluorescent?

  11. bubba lou says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if karaoke bar songs already had the vocals on them so all you had to do was quietly stand on the stage and look way too drunk?

  12. mr. immoral says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if a 3-year-old girl was missing and her mom was suspected because her car smelled like a dead body and she had looked up chloroform and breaking necks on the internet and said the babysitter was to blame but had no phone number for the babysitter and was videotaped partying shortly after kid went missing and then months later they found the kid’s skeleton a mile from the mom’s house?

    oh, wait. i thought this was the “wouldn’t it be horrible if” section. my mistake.

  13. i've got fleas says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you had a time capsule and could go back in time and stop hitler and milli vanilli?

  14. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if oceans were green and grass was blue?

  15. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if bluegrass had a clause where the mandolin and banjo players exploded if that went past a 2-minute solo?

  16. cartoon cop says:

    i believe you meant if “they” went past a 2-minute solo. harumph.

    also i detect a trouble inconsistency between “if was” and “if were.” need an official utasi.com style ruling, methinks. while one could get bogged down in grammer books and boring dictionaries, i would propose we turn to tim hardin, composer of “if i were a carpenter” and go with were in his honor.

  17. Gabe says:

    It’s all good depending on past or future tense. Wouldn’t it be cool if the past was the future? Oh crap, I think I just broke one of those space time things.

  18. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if wars were just fought with people throwing shoes at each other?

    (and yes, my running shoes would be banned under geneva convention rules because of the toxic stench.)

  19. little enrique says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if i HAD shoes???

  20. Emily says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if there were a refrigerator that opened at two ends, so you can install it between two walls and have refrigerator access from your home office or something?

  21. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if the words Barack and Obama didn’t come up as misspelled?

  22. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if what happened in Vegas didn’t stay in Vegas?

  23. watterson says:

    a true story.

    when i was a lad my first car was a chevy vega. we had many adventures together. i tended to drink a bit too much, and the vega many times bore the brunt of these actions.

    one night in west texas, having consumed far too much of a peppermint-flavored product that would not seem like such a great idea the next day, i raced at excessive speed toward the lake. only to find out that because of recent rains, the lake had been moved much closer than i expected. i found myself, and my vega, stuck in muddy water. rather than deal with it, i crawled in back and went to sleep.

    the next morning i walked a million miles back to town, got my brother (who had a jeep and wench) and towed the vega out. neither of us ever told anyone about the incident. and why?

    because whatever happens in vegas stays in Vegas.

  24. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if the previous story started with “wouldn’t it be cool if?”

  25. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if bite me?

  26. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if breakfast made itself?

  27. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if morning didn’t start until after 1 p.m.?

  28. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if getting discovered was as easy as getting the Discovery Channel?

  29. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if I knew then what I knew now?

  30. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if the people that made HEAD-ON would make something that you can apply directly to a pizza burn on the roof of your mouth?

  31. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if you could have a hot the way you have a cold? You know? Like you’d feel super good for a week or two and you wouldn’t be able to go to work.

  32. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if karaoke bars had songs with the vocal tracks already on them so all you had to do was sit and drink beer?

  33. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if they just gave up on the whole north korea-south korea thing and instead went to east korea and west korea, just to spread out the crazy hair guy a little more?

  34. little enrique says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if they changed the peace corps to the peas corps? then i could have peas.

  35. not Arantxa Sánchez Vicario says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if light beer actually came with a light in it so you could find yours in a dark bar?

  36. bubba lou says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if people didn’t steal my karaoke bar joke made in december? well, wouldn’t it?

  37. mr. immoral says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you got caught up in a Fonzie scheme, so that the only money you lost was the price of a leather jacket and some hair grease?

  38. brett favre says:

    WOULDN’T IT BE COOL IF I CAME OUT OF RETIREMENT? WOULDN’T IT???

    hmm. why is no one cheering?

  39. cartoon cop says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if Arkansas just gave up and started spelling it Arkansaw?

  40. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if time would fly when you weren’t having fun?

  41. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if “layoffs” and “playoffs” got reversed, so everyone who gets a playoff loses their job, and everyone who gets in a layoff gets to go to disneyland and sign a contract extension for $72 million?

  42. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if fast food actually made you fast?

    hey, wait. wouldn’t it be REALLY cool if fast food is the food you eat when are fasting?

  43. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if Tanzania marketed itself as a sunbathing resort?

    (ok, so you have to think about this one a while …)

  44. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if Arby’s had a system in which you could enter into binding negotiations with them over how much to pay for a meal?

    what? they already have that? Arbytration? oh. never mind.

  45. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if curiosity actually killed the cat then killed itself and we got to hear about it for a few days and watch a grainy video clip from skychopper news high above the crime scene?

  46. bk katz says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if hockey players weren’t locked into that seven, five, seven format?

    oh, wait. that’s haiku players. never mind.

    wouldn’t it be cool if haiku players occasionally ripped off the gloves and got into huge fistfights?

  47. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if musicians had health insurance so jay bennett didn’t have to die from an accidental overdose of painkillers while trying to scrape up the money for hip replacement? (caused from stage diving, of all things)?

    hmmm. that’s not really funny at all. still, wouldn’t it be cool?

  48. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if animal hormones and fertilizers used on crops, an advancement that makes our lives better, actually made our lives better.

  49. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if the jackson four still went on tour?

  50. Joe Utasi says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if retirement started right after college, you got 20 years fully paid, and THEN you had to find a job and make a living…

  51. not Arantxa Sánchez Vicario says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if universal health care allowed you to get treatment on other planets?

  52. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if Quality Inn Hotels were more important than Quantity Inn Hotels?

  53. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if “wouldln’t if be cool if” caught on?

  54. not Arantxa Sánchez Vicario says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if your family had a tradition of calling grandfathers Papa, followed by their name, so that you could convince your kid that your dad’s name was Rotzi. then anytime you wanted to go see your dad and your kid didn’t want to go, he’d go running down the street yelling “NO PAPA ROTZI! NO PAPA ROTZI!.”

    this is why i never had kids.

  55. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you could tug on your baseball cap, touch your belt, rub your hand across your chest and someone would give you a bundt cake?

  56. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if there were an entire store filled with Bundt items like Bundt pie and Bundtwiches and Bundtcola?

  57. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if at the end of Chapter 12 it said “and they all lived happily ever after.”

  58. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you went to the Bundt store and while you were holding a Bundt pie and a Bundtcola somebody flashed you the “steal” signal?

  59. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if people who quote the constitution the way others quote the Simpsons and Seinfeld started quoting the Simpsons and Seinfeld and vice versa?

  60. bubba lou says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you could get Sansabelt without pants?

  61. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if aliens, rather than planting pods in humans, would plant ipods? then after a short incubation period a delightful music player would pop out of your chest. of course you would die instantly but your significant other would have a lovely keepsake. if any aliens read gabe’s site, please consider. thanks.

  62. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if Gabe, using his vast millions of dollars, bought up all the web sites that have spellings vaguely related to his name, then routed them to gabrielutasi.com/com automatically. Then when it’s 4 a.m. and I’m typing Gabrieluasi.com and Gabrielutas.com and Gabriellanaughtynurses.com I would still got to the site rather than getting the message “YOU ARE A MORON YOU ARE PROBABLY TOO STUPID TO BE USING THE INTERNET JUST WATCH TV NEWS INSTEAD. Just an idea.

  63. ah chihuahua!!! says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if they went to the site of a ship sinking and all they could find floating on top was a jar of Sanka?

  64. brett favre says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if i came out of retirement again? what? i already did? damn concussions.

  65. Gabe says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if I could buy boxed soda the same way I buy boxed wine?

  66. not Arantxa Sánchez Vicario says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if your miranda rights were actually your carmen miranda rights, and you had the right to wear a large fruit hat on top of your head for your booking photo? and if you could not afford a large fruit hat, would one be appointed for you?

  67. not THAT amanda says:

    Wouldn’t it be cool if zombies were vegans? You wouldn’t have to worry about them eating your brains, and they’d likely be more fun than regular vegans.

  68. not THAT amanda says:

    sigh. wouldn’t it be cool if there were no google so you couldn’t search for the phrae “vegan zombies” only to find out that a bazillion people already thought of it? wouldn’t it be cool if there were no copyright infringement laws other than the ones that protected your stuff? and wouldn’t it be cool if everyone had chauffeur monkeys?

  69. watterson says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if your cat and the hummingbird waited until AFTER you had your first cup of coffee to play chase in the living room?

  70. Gabe says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if getting stitches hurt less than the event that caused you to need stitches in the first place?

  71. gary says:

    wouldn’t it be cool if you could send your cartoon up in a crude helium balloon and get three days of nauseatingly nonstop media coverage? hmmm…

  72. Gabe says:

    110209-rollercoaster.gif
    Wouldn’t it be cool if roller coasters were just little round pieces of cardboard with tiny wheels on them that kept your beverage from getting condensation on the tabletop?

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